Sunday, January 31, 2010

"Baby Got Back" Whited Verse 1

Intro:
Oh. My. God! Becky, look at her butt. It is so big. She looks like one of those rap guys’ girlfriends.
But, you know, who understands those rap guys? They only talk to her because she looks like a total prostitute, okay?
I mean, her butt is just so big. I can't believe it's just so round, it's like, out there, I mean—gross. Look! She's just so...black!


WHITED:
Oh. My. Heavens! Rebecca, gaze upon her posterior. It is unusually large.
She appears similar to one of those hip-hop artists’ mistresses.
Although, you understand, whosoever may fortune to comprehend those hip hop artists?
They only parlay with her because she appears to be an utter mattressback, do you see? To further: her posterior is simply so large!
I cannot compass the rotundity! It continues and continues—revolting. Mind! She is simply so…ancestrally African in ethnicity!

I like big butts and I cannot lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your tongue
'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring


I enjoy large posteriors—about that I cannot prevaricate
Every one among you other African American males cannot deny
That when a girl enters the room with a markedly svelte waistline
And a bulbous mass in your direct line of sight
You achieve an erection; you want to pull out your tongue (as in disbelief)
Because you notice the woman in question’s hind-end was full with shapeliness
Filling out completely the blue jeans she is adorned in
I am won over by her argument and shan't refrain from staring

Oh baby, I wanna get wit'cha
And take your picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But with that butt you got makes me so horny
Ooh, Rump-o'-smooth-skin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't that average groupie

Oh, dear, I would like so much to have intercourse with you
And photograph you
Friends of my peerage attempted to alert me
Alas, that derrière you have makes me feel eminently randy
Ooh, Rear-end-o'-smooth-skin (in the manner of tower-caged hair-maiden Rumpelstiltskin)
Did I understand you correctly that you wanted to ride in my (Mercedes) Benz?
If so, then use my body once for your carnal desires, and then again!
Because you are worthier than the average concert-attending floozie

I've seen them dancin'
The hell with romancin'
She's sweat, wet,
Got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette
I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back

I have seen them dancing
To hell with romancing!
She is sweaty, to the point of bodily wetness
She is moving her body in the manner of a turbo-charged Corvette automobile
I tire of periodicals
That insist that a lack of posterior roundness is the current trend
For example, if you were to ask the average African American man what he thinks of such a claim
He shall refute the claim with an opposing contention: posterior roundness is superior in his taste

So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!)
Shake that healthy butt!
Baby got back!

So, males! (Yes!) Males! (Yes!)
Is your girlfriend gifted with a colossal posterior? (Goodness, yes!)
If so, then ask her to gyrate it! (Gyrate it!) Gyrate it! (Gyrate it!)
Gyrate that healthful posterior!
"Baby" is gifted with an abnormally large fanny

L.A. face with the Oakland booty
Baby got back!

The woman in question has a face of a model from the city of Los Angeles with the posterior of a low-income African-American
"Baby" is certainly callipygous

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